Local Kenilwiorth bookmaker Peter ‘Paddy’ Power has slashed the odds on the Kenilworth 5 mile record being broken at the upcoming Banbury 5 mile road race.
The local bookie, renowned for donating all his profit to peace keeping efforts in the middle east and his foundation that carries out research into trying to genetically modify baby Otter to look slightly happier, was overheard giving out tips whilst chatting at the olive counter in his local Waitrose. He was rumoured to have said, ‘I’m betting that Rich Simkiss will break Paul Andrew’s club 5 mile record at Banbury….I hope so anyway’. The last bit was unconfirmed and he may have actually been asking for two dozen pimento olives, either way it shows a clear dislike of Andrew.
Paul Andrew was unavailable for comment, but we think he would have said something along the lines of. ‘What odds can he offer on me making it around without my leg falling off? The cheek of him! I’ve run about 3 races for this club without being injured and have obliterated those two fat lumps from McCarkiss Elite every time, have you seen the thighs on them? Now he is giving my records away, bloody Thatcherite.’
The time to beat is 25:59.