Great Birmingam ‘no-go’



No Great Birmingham Run for McCarkissElite

Source: HP.

News just breaking on the wires (whatever they or that is) confirms that all McCarkissElite athletes are to be pulled from the Great Birmingham Run following a disagreement relating to funding and prize money. With the probablity that the athletes will pick up absolutely no prize money in the team event being confirmed, a club decision to share this amount between all entrants has led to the withdrawal of all MCKEP sponsored athletes. The fact that the £0 that they would win as a team has to be split between all club members has caused great unrest in the MCKEP camp.

An anonynous member of Kenilworth Runners had this to say, ‘Who do they thing they are the elitist pr*cks, they aren’t even that fast yet they swan around with all this MCKEP crap thinking they are the best thing in Warwickshire.’ Another added, ‘I advise baking cup cakes for 20 minutes, that’s my secret’. No-one was available at the club to comment on the matter but they did send out a memo advising of the date of the next bake sale.

In a boycott remiscent of the Moscow games, this move may split the country down the middle with most people of Kenilworth (who can more often that  not be found in Waitrose at the baked goods aisle desperately trying to rid themselves of their excessive disposable income to avoid tax pitfalls) opting to not pass comment on their opinion, instead choosing to pretend they don’t know about the matter.

The MCKEP official statement can be found below:

All MCKEP athletes sign up to a strict code of conduct to at all times act with unwarranted elitism and to give off an air of arrogance. To distribute any winnings, even if valued at zero, to a less able runner, is strictly against our code. If we have nothing, we would give nothing to become nothing, nothing is everything.

R.Murdoch – MCKEP Press Officer


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